Reflective Ramblings

January 31, 2008 on 9:44 pm | In Thoughts |

Do you ever sometimes look back on a particular situation - a particular scene in your life - where you were interacting with another person, or group of people, and you did or said something that you wish you hadn’t? I’m not talking about wetting the bed on school camp kind of moments here. I’m talking about relational stuff. Do you ever replay those moments in your head where you said something to someone that you wished you could clarify? Ever wanted to say:

“Hey, you know in that situation when I <did/said something>, well I think I gave you <this> impression, and well, what I really meant to convey was <this other thing>.”

I just spent about 10 minutes replaying one of those moments that happened some months ago. Nothing major. Just an off-the-cuff comment that shot out of my mouth, that was true to what was happening in my heart at the time, but could have easily had a more awkward meaning read into it. The funny thing is that the people who were around when it happened probably don’t remember it. But quite obviously, part of me is still embarrassed. There is something I don’t like about that - the desire to “explain” or “clarify” myself like that. It has an element of weakness to it that I find quite disconcerting.

Do you ever find yourself in a similar headspace?
Why do you think that’s the case?
What does it tell you about yourself in light of the specific situation?

3 Comments »

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  1. I don’t know, but I do know that Geoff’s parents came and took your furniture away. We didn’t have to take the desk apart and everything was taken care of very carefully. It is being stored at theirs.

    Comment by Bec — February 1, 2008 #

  2. Glad to know it’s not just me that replays awkward moments in my head thinking of what I could have done better and cringing at the thought of it. While I’m generalising, I think part of the reason that I replay everything and want to fix it is because the people were somehow significant to me. I’m concerned that it will diminish the relationship we had or will make me seem less in their eyes( The former reason applying to very good friends and the latter to people who for some reason or other I want to impress).
    Take it the exam is finished from your blog activity

    Comment by Susannah — February 1, 2008 #

  3. You’d think it was over but alas I actually have two… next week.

    Comment by Paul — February 1, 2008 #

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